Monday, January 02, 2012

Benster and D Pick Your Bowl Games -- Somebody Has To

That's right -- somebody has to pick these bowl games, Decrepit. Are you up for the challenge? Has your Geritol kicked in, yet?

I seem to be awake without the aid of over-the-counter remedies, young fella.


That's always a good sign. Guess I can remove that toe tag I put on you while you were napping in your chair. I was pretty busy yesterday monitoring the half-dozen touchdown passes Matt Flynn threw against the Lions, but now the New Year's Day bowl games are coming, only a day later. So we'd better get these picked before the teams actually hit the field. Watch me work!

Houston Cougars (-7) vs. Penn State Nittany Scandals, in the Ticket City Bowl. Ticket City Bowl? What the heck is that? You told me that Ticket City is Rosendale, Wisconsin, because of that cop who sits on the side street and pulls over anyone that comes through town. This must be some other Ticket City. And this certainly isn't the destination that either of these teams expected. Penn State was last seen scraping themselves off the turf in Madison, where the Old Dude and I witnessed the carnage. As for Houston, they were rolling along undefeated until they ran into a real team and were waxed. So here's the question -- is Penn State, after everything that has happened, a real team? No, I don't think they are, because they can't score. Houston can score and they score a lot. Houston 49, Scandal State 10.


Uh, no. Houston is adequate but a team that gets killed by Southern Mississippi isn't going to score a ton against Penn State. I suspect Penn State might be a little short offensively, though. Houston 24, Penn State 20.


Floriduh Gators (-2) vs. The Ohio State University Buckeye Cheating Weasels, in the ever-popular TaxSlayer.com Gator Bowl. I don't imagine the Buckeyes would ever use TaxSlayer. I assume that they would use Tax Evader instead, given their sudden penchant for cheating. But here they are, 6-6 record and all, against the worst Florida team to take the field in a long time. The Gators are also 6-6. So, tell me this, Decrepit -- since when do we put 6-6 teams in New Year's Day bowl games? I thought these were supposed to be a reward for excellence, not crappiness. Meanwhile, the story behind the story is that Urban Meyer, who used to coach Florida, will now be taking over Ohio State. So that's supposed to add intrigue to the matchup. I don't see it -- what I see are two bad teams. Cheaty McSweater Alumni Association 24, Gator Bait 17.


I agree. Bad game. Nothing else to say. Florida 21, Ohio State 16.


Georgia Bulldawgs (-3) vs. Michigan State Sparty the Spartan, in the Outback Bowl. Michigan State is mad because they lost the Big Ten Championship and were relegated to the Outback Bowl instead of getting a BCS bid. Well, sorry. You guys lost the game. And the last time the Spartans played in a bowl game, they were edged by Alabama 49-7. The Spartans love the sound of their own voices, but they need to shut up and play football. Georgia is a pretty good, but not great, SEC team. If the Spartans were really robbed, they should go into Tampa and kick some Bulldog butt. Will they? UGA 49, Sparty 7.


That was harsh. I think Sparty will do better this time. Georgia isn't that great. Michigan State 34, Georgia 31.


South Carolina Gamecocks (-2 1/2) vs. Nebraska Cornhuskers in the Capitol One Bowl. Nebraska fans were probably expecting a better trip than to Orlando this year. I'm guessing a lot of them were thinking Pasadena, but as it turns out, the Big Ten is a little tougher than they might have envisioned. South Carolina was a much better team before for their stud running back Marcus Lattimore got hurt and they've been riding their defense for the second part of the season. This is not a great Nebraska team, but they are capable. Huskers 35, Gamecocks 20.


I think Nebraska is better. South Carolina had a chance to be great, as the young fella mentioned, but losing Lattimore was a crushing blow. The Cornhuskers have Rex Burkhead and he'll be the difference today. Nebraska 27, South Carolina 19.


Oregon Ducks (-6) vs. Beloved Wisconsin Badgers, in the Rose Bowl. I know what everyone has been saying. It's speed vs. power and the Badgers are not fast enough. I would have thought we put that to rest back in '09, after the Badgers took down Miami. Last year the Badgers didn't play their game against TCU until it was too late, but they showed everyone what a force they could be. This year has turned on two Hail Mary type passes that didn't go the Badgers' way. The Badgers can score any way they'd like. Oregon is fast, but defensively they are very small. The Badgers have a very, very big offensive line. And they are athletic, too. Ask the teams that have been steamrolled along the way. Badgers 63, Ducks 56.


So the Badgers are going to win the game on free throws at the end, then? It will be high scoring, I agree, but not that high scoring. I think the key is for the Badgers to get on the scoreboard first. If Oregon goes to the lead, the Badgers will be in trouble, but if the Badgers have a chance to control the tempo early, they'll win. The most important part of the game might the opening coin toss. Badgers 42, Oregon 37.


Oklahoma State Cowboys (-4) vs. Stanford Cardinal in the Fiesta Bowl. Oklahoma State was the one team that was legitimately screwed in the BCS extravaganza this year. They lose a game in Ames on the same day that their women's basketball team suffers a plane crash and they are suddenly relegated to this game? Hardly seems right. Of course the BCS doesn't know what's right and never, ever has done the right thing. So it goes. Can Oklahoma State prove a point tonight against a very good Stanford team led by next year's top draft pick, Andrew Luck? Can OK State coach Mike Gundy let fly a memorable rant? I'm a Man, I'm 40! 35, Stanford 34.


I remember that rant. I just can't watch the video because it so, well, orange. Hurts my eyes. I agree with the young fella about what happened to Oklahoma State, especially since I think if they'd played LSU it would have been a really entertaining game. This one will be too, though. Last year Stanford felt like they got screwed and put it to their opponent. Will the Cowboys do the same thing? Oklahoma State 28, Stanford 20.


Well, that's a lot of games. I suppose we could pick the Sugar Bowl, but I'm not feeling it. So here's my score without analysis. Go Blue 21, Va Tech 17.


More points, same result. Michigan 35, Virginia Tech 24.


That's it for now. We'll look at the BCS Scampionship game later on. Ben out!



3 comments:

Gino said...

sorry boys, the Badgers will need to be a few TDs ahead at the half.
less than that, OR will take them. big strong dudes dont fare well vs small fast flying ducks in the second half.

W.B. Picklesworth said...

And it's a tie at halftime....

Gino said...

told ya...