Wednesday, January 18, 2012

How Does Marianne Gingrich End Newt's Career with One Interview?

That's the premise behind all the chattering going on about the interview that ABC News apparently did with Marianne Gingrich, the second wife of Newt Gingrich, the known reprobate who is running for president on the Republican side of the equation.

I'm hard pressed to think of what this woman could say about Newt that would be any worse than what we already know about the guy. I mean, it's well established that he's a narcissist, a blowhard and that he has a difficult time controlling his genitalia, which was standard presidential behavior in the 1990s, of course. So what could she tell us that we don't already know? Let's make this a contest and solicit your guesses. I'll throw out a few possibilities to get things started:

  • Newt killed a puppy with his bare hands
  • Newt did the voiceover work in the 1980s for the Snuggle the Fabric Softener Bear ad campaign
  • Newt was once a roadie for Uriah Heep
  • Newt left Marianne because of a torrid affair/love triangle involving Garry Trudeau and Barbara Mikulski
  • Newt actually is the Antichrist
  • Newt never once offered Marianne the opportunity to "Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go"
  • Newt is actually the Red Squirrel and has abandoned his presidential bid to run for Mayor of the MOB
I'll stop now before this becomes a NIGP Top 11 List. Weigh in!

13 comments:

Gino said...

newt started the very first Rick Roll.

Anonymous said...

She's just ticked because he cheated ON her just like he cheated WITH her. You have to wonder what her expectations were.

J. Ewing

Mr. D said...

True, JE. There's more than a little of the frog and the scorpion involved here.

W.B. Picklesworth said...

He's better than Obama because, let's be real, Obama is a disaster. Yet he is a real stinker.

Brian said...

So it appears he asked wife #2 for an open marriage type arrangement wherein they remained married for public consumption while he carried on with Callista and she helped him become president.

That's pretty skuzzy, but it also isn't exactly shocking in the context of what we already knew about the guy.

Personally, I think it reveals more about his hubris and unrealistic assessment of the world than his world than his character (which we already knew was dreadful). Even if Marianne agreed to this arrangement, it's hard to imagine how he could have pursued public life (no less the presidency) and kept it quiet the whole time.

All of which assumes that Marianne's story is true. It certainly seems plausible, but also impossible to verify/refute unless Newt was dumb enough to put it writing.

Mr. D said...

Personally, I think it reveals more about his hubris and unrealistic assessment of the world than his world than his character (which we already knew was dreadful). Even if Marianne agreed to this arrangement, it's hard to imagine how he could have pursued public life (no less the presidency) and kept it quiet the whole time.

You'll get no argument from me. I think he should run for president of France.

Gino said...

"So it appears he asked wife #2 for an open marriage type arrangement wherein they remained married for public consumption ..."

he knows history well, so he also knows it worked in the past: FDR/JFK/LBJ/Clinton...

he just forgot to take into account todays media vs anybody GOP.

Mr. D said...

he just forgot to take into account todays media vs anybody GOP.

Republican genitalia is evil.

Brian said...

Yes, the media blackout on the sexual indiscretions of Anthony Wiener, Elliot Spitzer, John Edwards, and Bill Clinton was nearly total. It's amazing we even know about them.

Mr. D said...

Yes, the media blackout on the sexual indiscretions of Anthony Wiener, Elliot Spitzer, John Edwards, and Bill Clinton was nearly total. It's amazing we even know about them.

Heh. Actually Gingrich is an interesting test case and I’ll tell you why.

Generally, Republicans who are caught in sex scandals disappear and aren’t heard from again. When is the last time you heard what Bob Livingston or Bob Packwood or Mark Foley or Larry Craig is up to? In that sense, Newt is more like Clinton or Spitzer, who have both remained in the arena after the discovery of their infidelities.

Back in the old days, Democrats would resign in shame and leave the stage, too — Wilbur Mills, Wayne Hays and Gary Hart are examples of that. But it changed with Clinton, at least for some Democrats. I’ll bet we hear from Wiener again, too.

Brian said...

Honestly, I only care about the sex lives of politicians to the extent that they publicly pontificate (and legislate) about those of others.

Powerful men tend to have women throwing themselves at them. It's biology. And it's pretty easy for those of us on the sidelines who aren't so lucky (if you care to call it that) to say we'd do better in their shoes. (Though as far as we know, every recent president except Clinton has managed to keep it in his pants, so it can't be that hard.)

I can live with human failing. But not with moralizing hypocrites.

Mr. D said...

I can live with human failing. But not with moralizing hypocrites.

Understood. Me, I'm less concerned about Gingrich's zipper problems than his general unreliability, of which his zipper is merely one manifestation.

Gino said...

Brian: the last 10-12 yrs are a bit of an historical anomoly as far as the press goes. the mainstream is often led around, and at times pressured by, the blogosphere and such site as drudge. even with wiener, they were reluctant and didnt start reporting til late in the game.

they spent most of the 90s telling us it 'was only sex' in regards to clinton, and not a sign of his real political character, yadda yadda.

now these same outlets want to promote newt's sex problems after spending 50yrs pushing the kennedy's on us, or making jesse jackson the heir of His Holiness MLK, who... um, btw the way... had a few 'character' issues of his own.