Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Guilty Pleasures Part Thirty-Nine: Teen Pop Sensations, as chosen by Fearless Maria out of Gino's Personal Record Collection

Our friend Gino was concerned that we were running out of ideas for posts here at Mr. Dilettante. While that hardly seems likely, sometimes you have to dig deep to get some traction. While Gino was in the hospital last year, he foolishly gave me the keys to his old blog, Such is Life. Among the "contributions" that I made to his blog was to take a survey of Gino's record collection. Gino may not have noticed, but I actually made some electronic copies of some of his other favorite songs, just in case my inspiration was flagging. I have consulted with a musical expert and my partner in crime, my daughter Fearless Maria, and we have chosen from Gino's vast collection a few especially happenin' tunes for your dining and dancing pleasure this evening. Remember, these are Gino's favorite songs, so be gentle in your observations.

Maria, what do we have first?

Well Dad, I'd like to start out with teen sensation Bobby Sherman! I heard that back in the day, people used to say, "Peace, Love and Bobby Sherman!" Sounds groovy, Dad. Isn't it boss? You said stuff like that when you were a kid, right? So anyway, here is the man himself, Mr. Bobby Sherman!

Dad tells me that Gino still has an outfit just like what Bobby Sherman is wearing. Nice neckwear, Gino! Is that an ascot or your old kerchief from the Cub Scouts?

Anyway, that's enough of Bobby Sherman. Let's move on to a 70s freak. I heard that some of Dad's sisters liked this guy. I'm not quite sure why, but maybe they can explain it some time. But what's really weird is that Gino likes this guy so much. He's Shaun Cassidy!

Da doo run run? No, Gino, run for your life! I really like the beginning part, when Shaun does his Miles Davis imitation and turns his back to the audience! Miles Davis and Shaun Cassidy, together for the first time ever? Not only in a song, but probably in a sentence!

So far, I gotta say that Gino's record collection is pretty lame. Now I know that a lot of people really liked this next guy. He could fix you up in the hospital and sing to you afterwards. Dad, was Gino in General Hospital? Maybe he saw this guy, the singing doctor dude, Rick Springfield!

At least he dresses a little better than Bobby Sherman. That's something, huh Dad? And that song isn't quite as lame, either. Less "do" in it than the first two songs!

Dad, I'm not so sure about Gino's record collection. Are there any better songs than this?

I don't know, Maria. So far, I have to agree, this stuff is pretty lame. Try this one and see what you think. These guys are called the New Kids on the Block, but it's been a pretty long time since they were new.

Dad, these guys are pretty lame, too! What's up with the hats, anyway? And the dancing -- looks like they are going flip on their head and crack it open like a melon! And that might be an improvement!

Dad, enough of this. I'm taking us out of all this old guy junk that Gino loves so much and it's time to kick it up a notch. Kick it new school. Like this one!

Gino, you should get this one! Nobody's Perfect! And your record collection proves that Hannah Montana is right!

And now it's time for these folks. They are huge right now, too! This is from Camp Rock -- no, not a Boy Scout camp where you would wear your Bobby Sherman kerchief, Gino! Check it out!

No, not Play That Funky Music, Gino! Try to keep up! These guys just played at the White House for Sasha and Malia! I don't think the Play That Funky Music guys could even get past the security gate. Dad made me put that link in. It's pretty stupid if you ask me!

Okay, vote for something now. Mom says I need to go to bed right away!

Thanks for loaning us your records, Gino! Mighty sporting of you.


W.B. Picklesworth said...

Oy, this reminds me not to poke fun at Herr Dilettante. He goes nasty!

And don't think that I'm clicking on any of those links.

Gino said...

i'm an attention whore. :)

and i think KD owes me a swipe as well.

Mark Heuring said...

Nasty? Me? Naw....

It was good practice for Maria, though.


You're not an attention whore. You're just a guy who occasionally needs some, ahem, positive reinforcement. That's all. Thanks again for the use of your record collection. Maria wants to know if she can borrow those back issues of Tiger Beat for a few more days, though.

Night Writer said...

Bobby Sherman? Shaun Cassidy? What about everyone's heartthrob - Mr. David Cassidy? And didn't Gino have any 45s from the terminally mopey Gilbert O'Sullivan? Actually, I kind of picture Gino as being more of a fan of The Buoys, and I wish the Buoys had gone spelunking with Gilbert instead of the unfortunate Timothy.

Btw, back in my agency days I wrote a rap song for my National Sea Products client that their execs lip-synced at a sales conference: I called the group New Cods on the Block. As I recall, there was a line in the rap about "the funky, cold Atlantic." Good times, good times.

Mark Heuring said...

Funky Cold Atlantic? That's sweet, NW!

There probably was a David Cassidy song somewhere in there, NW, but Gino's cataloging skills leave something to be desired and Maria and I didn't have time to comb Gino's extensive collection of K-Tel offerings.

We might have to revisit Gino's collection of mopey stuff – he's got a lot of that, too. Gilbert O'Sullivan, David "Run Joey Run" Geddes, Morris "Feelings" Albert — it's all there, but it's going to take a dedicated archivist to go through it all.

And just to be clear on one point – Maria really did most of the work on this post, including many of the one-liners. I'm quite proud of her.

Mike said...

I've said it before, and I'll say it again...Maria is funnier than a lot of adults I know, and not in the "kids say the darndest things" way either.

Chuckwagon Boy said...

Peace, love and Bobby Sherman to you, sir! :o)