Benster and D Pick Your Games: #Karma and LOL Illinois Edition

Remember when the Badgers were going to lose to Illinois again? Pepperidge Farm remembers. In fact, some might say it was #karma. 

Instant Karma's gonna get you. Knock you right in the head. 

Meanwhile, the Packers need to figure some things out.

They could start with playing better. And maybe coaching better. Two problems that are often related.

I am feeling the HYYYYYYYYYYYYYYPPPEEEEE! and ready to pick some games. Watch me work.

Michigan State Sparty the Spartan (+7) vs. Minnesota Golden Elite Rowers of the Boat I've been very critical of PJ in the past, and used the he can't beat Iowa stat. Well, it turns out that he proved me wrong on that point. In the interest of full disclosure, the Badger game last week got all of my attention, and didn't see a second of the Gophers. After looking at the highlights, the punt return call was the right call. Instead of complaining about a rule that has been on the books for a while, Iowa could instead blame the offense for not doing anything in the second half and failed to win the game. Somehow, Sparty's football scandal is not nearly as bad as what is happening in Ann Arbor, but we will talk later as more and more of that story comes out. Look, the Gophers should win against the Spartans, especially since the momentum of getting the Iowa monkey off their back will make for a fired up crowd at the Bank. Row Row Row Your Boat Elitely 42, Mel Tucker Fumbled The Bag 0.

Sparty is, ya know, kinda terrible? The Gophers aren't as strong this year as in previous years, but they're plenty good enough to win this game. Minnesota 24, Michigan State 3.

A School In Columbus (-14.5) vs. Beloved Wisconsin Badgers Last week was an incredible 4th quarter performance, and it turns out that the Badgers got their crap together just in the nick of time. Longo calling a tackle eligible pass for the winning touchdown took incredible guts, and props to Locke for getting a win in his first start on the road in Big Ten play, similar to Hornibrook in 2016 at Spartan Stadium. Look, we all know that Ohio State is arguably the best team in the country and coming off a big win against Penn State last week. Here is the thing, though. The Buckeyes have been slow starters, and dodged bullets against Maryland, Notre Dame, and Penn State by having their high end talent bail them out in the second half. The weather in Madison is going to be cold, and Fickell also isn't scared of the Buckeyes given that he knows how they operate in a way that few coaches do in the Big Ten. This won't be easy, I'll readily admit that. But the thing is, Buckeye fans are so mad about Michigan that they are forgetting that this is one of their toughest games all year, and the Curse of the Six Game Minimum is still intact. How about Fickell getting a signature win? You heard it here first. Badgers 24, Buckeyes 17.

I'd love to agree with you. But the Badgers aren't ready for this. Check back in a few years. Ohio State 34, Wisconsin 17.

Minnesota Vikings (-1.5) vs. Glorious Green Bay Packers Serious question, did the Packers actually prepare for Denver at all? It was the same mistakes over and over, and honestly LaFleur is falling into the same traps that Sherman fell into in 2005. You are lucky that I had another special thing I wanted to do, because the Packers have learned nothing this year. Meanwhile, the Vikings beat the Niners in a performance that deserved a win, and they are coming into Lambeau in a good position to try and calm down the angry Vikings fans who light up the KFAN phone lines. What the Packers need to do is figure out how to start better, and actually have a defense that looks good. I get that you can't blame the defensive coaches when they are dealing with a bunch of injuries. But have you tried anything different? The good news is that the Packers should be due for a win. If not, I'm going to have to go deep, and you don't want me to do that. Packers 35, Vikings 21. 

The Packers are, ya know, not very good right now. And they have injuries galore. Vikings aren't great, either, but I don't see a lot of evidence that the Packers are good enough to win at this moment. So I have to pick it as follows: Vikings 27, Packers 17.

And now, it's time to laugh at Illinois and Bert. Those that are not Badger fans might be wondering why what happened last week made us feel so glad about this. They may be asking themselves why Badger fans hate Bert given the success he had. It's true, Bert had a lot of success in Madison. I don't have a problem with Bert leaving. What I do have a problem with is him calling out fans on Twitter who are mad at him, leaving 3 days after winning a Big Ten title, saying that the program can't win compared to Arkansas, and having his wife tweet #karma after the 2013 debacle against Arizona State. Here is the funny thing. Wisconsin has won a lot more than he has since he left, and came a heck of a lot closer to playing for a national championship compared to his time coaching at Arkansas. By the way, how is it easier to win games when you spent time in the very strong SEC West circa 2014 compared to Wisconsin being in the Big Ten West? 

He might have been mistaken?

Ya think? God it was great seeing the Badgers win. They played great in the 4th quarter, and ended up looking like what Fickell wants from his offense with a mixture of downfield passing and the trademark power run game. Blaming the refs? How about blaming yourself for burning timeouts, losing your physical edge, and some baffling decisions. It's like the Rose Bowl against TCU all over again. Way to burn bridges, Bert. 

He also might want to burn the orange clothes, too.

The American Heart Association has him on the watch list for other reasons, too

Glad you're paying attention to fashion, Old Dude! Enjoy your football this weekend. Ben out. 

Benster and D Pick Your Games----We Didn't Steal Signs Edition

 So I didn't know that Jim Harbaugh decided it was a good idea to hire the 2017 Astros baseball ops people to steal signs.

He's a big fan of Brenton Wood:

That might be your most obscure effort yet, Old Dude!

I contain multitudes, Seabiscuit.

A few bran flakes should clear that up. Meanwhile, the Badgers have some explaining to do. I hate to bust the axe out this early, but they gave me no choice. 

They aren't playing the Gophers this week, are they?

You seem slower on the uptake than usual. Didn't think that was even possible. But I move on, as I am feeling the HYYYYYYYYYYYPPPEEEEEEE! and ready to pick some games. Watch me work.

Minnesota Golden Elite Rowers of the Boat (+3.5) vs. Iowa Hawkeyes So Iowa already beat one of their rivals in a game we will talk more about, and now they get ready to face the Gophers. As much as I get called a hater for pointing out how Row The Boat has manipulated history to brandish his culture more, the fact remains that he has never beaten Iowa. Quite frankly, this game is going to live up to all of the stereotypes that surround Big Ten football. There is going to be a lot of running, plenty of punting, and not a lot of cutting edge offense. This game is going to be ugly, and the Iowans should win this one comfortably. No matter what, I will get to laugh at one of these teams. Iowa 14, Row Row Row Your Boat 11, Viewers Fall Asleep.

I dozed off reading your prediction. Never a good sign. Iowa 20, Minnesota 9.

Beloved Wisconsin Badgers (-2.5) vs. Illinois Fighting Illini Last week was a disaster for the Badgers on so many levels, and it's at the level of 2015 Northwestern and 2015 Iowa in terms of anger. Locke should be better with a full week of prep, and quite frankly a less stout defense. Illinois has been terrible all year, but then again the Big Ten West might be the worst division throughout the FBS as every single team is various levels of inept. This would be nice to win as the Badgers owe Illinois one for the disaster last year that ended up bringing the current coaching staff to Madison. Look for an angry group of Badgers to come out and get it done. Badgers 31, Illini 12.

Don't like this game. Bielema is a good coach. Illinois isn't talented, but the Badgers appear to be overhyped and with a freshman quarterback, it's a tall order. Against my better judgment, I say: Badgers 21, Illinois 20.

Penn State Nittany Lions (+4.5) vs. A School In Columbus So, the Buckeyes have been playing well. They had the narrow escape from South Bend, and survived against Maryland a couple of weeks ago. A game against Penn State at home should be easy, right? Not so fast, my friend. Penn State has been playing really well, and this is the best team they have had in years. Ohio State has looked shaky, and they are still under the Curse of the Six Game Minimum, which the Buckeyes know what to take down in their stadium to undo. I like Penn State to come into the Horseshoe to send the arrogant fanbase to blow up the phone lines of talk shows all across Ohio for the crime of losing a football game. Penn State 28, #NotMy2020BigTenChampions 26.

You realize no one cares about any of that, right? As for the game, I think Penn State is good enough to beat the Buckeyes in the Horshshoe this time. Will they? Ohio State 28, Penn State 27.

San Francisco 49ers (-6.5) vs. Minnesota Vikings Well, the Vikings survived disaster last week, but the problem is that they are facing a much tougher test. The Niners may be banged up, but they are more talented than the Vikings are. I'll say this, Niners. You better win in this window, or you are going to have a lot of questions to answer about how you've done things lately. Niners 56, Vikings 0.

No McCaffrey. No Deebo, perhaps. A banged up Brock Purdy. I think the Niners win, but it won't be easy. Niners 24, Vikings 17.

Glorious Green Bay Packers (-1) vs. Denver Broncos So the good news for the Packers is that despite the disaster in the desert a couple of weeks ago, the team looks to be healthier after the bye, and are playing a Broncos team that although they have the pieces, have clearly been a disaster. The Broncos can't stop anyone, and the Packers hopefully used the bye week to stop being dumb and cover pass catchers with defensive linemen. This should be a nice bounce back. Packers 49, Broncos 5.

Denver is a hot mess. Packers really haven't proved anything. We'll see. I think the only thing that saves the Packers is the ineptitude of the opposition. Packers 24, Broncos 16.

And now, it's time for a Very Special Comment. Wisconsin, what in the world was that? I was enjoying a nice weekend out of town, and spent 3 hours watching this team have an ugly meltdown. Fickell, I love you, but the decision to not take the field goal in the first quarter was bad. I realize that you can't blame the coaches when players get hurt, but did you even try to adjust? It was vanilla playcalling, being conservative, and the game was decided when the Hawkeyes took the lead in the first half. Did Longo even try to do something unique? No, it was passing the ball all the time, even though Locke looked raw. I mean, good lord. You knew points were at a premium in that game, and sleepwalked through that game. You need to figure your shit out, or we might not even make a bowl game this year. What are you going to do about it? I expect far better, and you let me me down. 

We'll let the expletive go this time, because it's deserved. I think the brain trust in Madison needs to channel Brenton Wood and give us some kind of sign that things are getting better.

Enjoy your football this weekend. Ben out. 

Benster and D Pick Your Games----Rutting Iowans Edition

 Old dude, the Iowans have something that the Badgers need to get back, or maybe the Ferentz family is using that to stay employed.

Well they certainly aren't using offensive acumen!

Shot slate this week, because we're traveling. Still I am ready to pick some games, and it is time to watch me work, and am feeling the HYYYYYYYYPPPEEEEE!

Iowa Hawkeyes (+10) vs. Beloved Wisconsin Badgers Luke Fickell was brought to Madison in part because the Badgers need to start winning games against Iowa and Minnesota, and this is a great place to start. Iowa is offensively challenged, and despite the worry that our old pal Mr. Deacon Hill will be ready for revenge, the Badgers should be able to get enough points to maybe force Iowa to reevaluate handing over their program to nepotism. Oh wait, they are Iowa and will be doing dumb decisions anyway. Wisconsin 31, Iowa 0.

It's on brand for them. Still, Iowa is a tough out every time and the Badgers are not exactly setting the world on fire in this transition year. I think they will play enough defense to keep the Iowans at bay and score just enough points to win. Wisconsin 17, Iowa 6.

Minnesota Vikings (-2.5) vs. Bear Down Chicago Da Bearz Still Suck So the Vikings don't have the Griddy man for a while. That will suck for them, but the bottom line is that this team has regressed to the mean. They aren't winning many close games anymore, and it turns out that the Vikings sold their souls for a year that ended in pain yet again. Da Bearz are even worse, even though the game is in Chicago. Nothing will change for the Bears until they get new ownership, as much as people want to deny it. Vikings 21, Bears Still Suck 0.

Smart Bears fans agree with you, Benster, although a smart Bears fan is at best a theoretical construct. As for the game, no need to buy Sominex this week, kids - just tune in the (ahem) action in Chicago! Bears 17, Vikings 16.

Enjoy your football this weekend. Ben out. 

Benster and D Pick Your Games-----Peacock Is A Terrible Idea For Big Ten Football Edition

Seriously? You are putting my Badgers on Peacock? What the heck did they spike the Philly cheesesteaks with at the Comcast corporate cafeteria with? What's wrong with USA network? It's not the Big Ten's fault that Comcast can't run a profitable streaming service that nobody asked for. I might have to go to Buffalo Wild Wings again to watch the Badgers. 

Maybe they have a deal with Peacock? Are you sure those wings are chicken?

Meanwhile, while I'd normally do a Very Special Comment about the disaster last Thursday night, thankfully another sports team I love ended a streak, and I'm in a better mood. We'll talk about that later.

Did it involve Royce Lewis?

Emphatically yes. I am feeling the HYYYYYYYYYYPPPEEEEEE! and ready to pick some games. Watch me work.

Michigan Wolverines (-18.5) vs. Minnesota Golden Elite Rowers of the Boat The Gophers struggled to get by the Cajuns, but thankfully dodged the bullet in the second half. But this week is going to be a huge increase in difficulty. Michigan has been criticized in some quarters for playing an easy schedule, but they won all of their games, and starting next year when our new Big Ten members join us, the easy schedule complaint goes away. The Wolverines play bully ball at a higher level and with better athletes. So while PJ continues to come up with new slogans and designs for oar branded merchandise for Goldy's Locker Room, Michigan will win in decisive fashion. Wolverines 60, Row Row Row Your Boat Elitely 10.

What, you have a problem with merchandising? Let's see what ol' Peej can do to sell what happens tomorrow. It won't be pretty. Michigan 38, Gophers 7.

Buttgers Scarlet Knights (+13.5) vs. Beloved Wisconsin Badgers The Badgers ended up playing well to get by Purdue, but losing Chez Mellusi is a tough blow. Rutgers is improving and will now get a full share of BTN revenue. However, they still aren't there yet, and the Badgers have been bedding in well to Fickell's changes in how the program runs. Mordecai's running ability is a nice X factor, and the Badgers defense stood tall when Purdue made their rally in the 4th quarter. Wisconsin should win comfortably after a close 1st half. Badgers 42, Scarlet Knights 17.

That sounds right. They will miss Mellusi for sure, but not this week. Badgers 34, Scarlet Knights 14.

Taylor Swift Kansas City Chiefs (-3.5) vs. Minnesota Vikings I got nothing against Taylor Swift, and I get she's just supporting her boyfriend, but this whole thing of featuring her all the time during the past two Chiefs games is too much. Let the lady watch the game in peace, and may CBS keep that to the pregame and postgame only. The Vikings got it done in the second half against a game Carolina squad. It goes without saying that the Chiefs are going to be a much tougher out than the Panthers, even though the game is downtown. If the Vikings defense had trouble stopping Baker and Bryce Young, then stopping Mahomie is going to be a tall ask. Chiefs 34, Vikings 14.

I don't see the Vikings having an enjoyable afternoon, either. Chiefs 34, Vikings 20.

Glorious Green Bay Packers (-1.5) vs. Las Vegas Raiders The Packers came out flat last week, and that was an unacceptable coaching performance by the coaching staff. The good news is that the Raiders are led by a moron in Josh McDaniels, who clearly learned from his former boss in New England about how not to keep his word to a team about accepting a head coaching job. Jimmy G will be good to go, and it looks like the Packers are going to be healthier going into this game. What I want to see is some fire, some deep balls connect, and for the Packers to actually be able to stop someone running the ball. The Raiders are not a good team, and the Packers should win this one. Also, the good news is that this is one of the only times this year I have to listen to Troy Aikman continue to get paid millions of dollars every year despite never offering any insights at all. Packers 28, Raiders 0.

Aikman has a good point, but you never saw it because he wore a helmet. I think this will be much more difficult than you do. The Packers will not shut out the Raiders. But I do think the Packers will have enough firepower to win. Packers 31, Raiders 23.

And now, it's time to talk about the Twins and how proud I am. The Twins came into this postseason facing a stat that is almost beyond belief, yet has haunted the franchise for almost two decades. 0-18 in playoff games since Game 1 of the 2004 ALDS against the Yankees. For Twins fans like me, any regular season success would lead to getting swept out of the playoffs, often finding new and exciting ways to lose. A missed call by Phil Cuzzi in 2009 at Yankee Stadium, getting swept by the A's in 2006 despite having the Cy Young, MVP, batting champion, and a Gold Glove winner, getting manhandled by Didi in 2017 and 2019, losing to a Houston team that had a losing record in 2020, and the damn 2008 AL Central tiebreaker against the White Sox. So when I attended the first game of the Wild Card against the Jays on Tuesday afternoon, I knew that despite my optimism about this team, things could go wrong. 

But then a funny thing happened. Royce Lewis hit two home runs, Pablo Lopez pitched very well to validate why we got him from the Marlins, Michael A Taylor made some great catches, and Carlos Correa delivered on his contract by making one of the best plays I've ever seen in person. Myself, Kirko, and 38,000 others stood tall and created an incredible atmosphere all afternoon long. Once Johan Duran closed out the game, there was an overwhelming feeling of joy, excitement, and relief. Finally, my beloved Twins had won a playoff game. No more jokes about how the Twins can't win in the playoffs. I must admit that when the Twins won, I teared up. Not of sadness, but of joy. Finally, the Twins were just another team fighting for a title, without the baggage of a streak that will take something to be broken. 

Shout a hip hooray!

And on Wednesday, the Twins finished the job and swept a postseason series for the first time in team history, and won a playoff series at home for the first time since the 1991 World Series. As I watched Duran strike out the final batter, there was joy and excitement. No longer would I watch my beloved Twins in the playoffs without fear. While Houston is going to be a tough ask in the ALDS, the Twins have already given their fans the one thing I asked of them. We aren't cursed in the playoffs, and we are just another team trying to advance. No more pressure. From the bottom of my heart, thank you Falvine, thank you Rocco, thank you Royce, thank you Correa, thank you Taylor, thank you Pablo, and thank you Sonny. The pain of October baseball in my childhood has gone away, and a new era of Twins baseball has begun. 

Enjoy your football this weekend, and let's go Twins. Ben out.