Thursday, January 10, 2008

Fearless Dilettante Football Predictions - I Am the Walrus Edition

I am he as you are he and you are me and we are all together. So why not make some football picks?

Green Bay Packers 31, Seattle Seabags 24. The first thing to realize is that it won't be easy. Mike Holmgren is still a fine football coach and he understands Brett Favre better than most opposing coaches. There is no question that the Walrus will find ways to get inside Brett's head and I'm guessing that Favre will not be flawless this time. But the Packers are healthy and the great equalizer for the Seahawks, running back Shaun Alexander, is not the same guy he was two years ago. Look for Ryan Grant to continue his excellent Dorsey Levens imitation, figure that someone surprising (maybe James Jones?) will do something big and that in the end, the Pack will win. But it won't be easy.
ACTUAL RESULT: PACKERS 42, SEAHAWKS 20. What a fun game - the snow, the long runs, the ferocious tackling by Atari Bigby. One of the most enjoyable Packer games I've seen in my life, and I've seen a lot of them. Ryan Grant giveth and Ryan Grant taketh away. One thing, though - I wouldn't recommend spotting the other team 14 points next time, especially if the game is in Dallas.

Dallas Cowboahs 27, New York Football Giants 24. Oh, how I'd love to pick the G-Men. And there are reasons for optimism. But I have two feelings about this game. One is that Marion Barber is going to be a big-time stud; and more importantly, I think Terrell Owens is playing possum. The Giants are good and have been tough on the road. But their road ends here.
ACTUAL RESULT: G-MEN 21, COWBOAHS 17. This result will get the most analysis (and psychoanalysis) of the weekend, but not here. No schadenfreude either. You just have to give the Giants credit for doing what it took to win. They will be a formidable foe for my beloved Packers.

New England Evil Empire 34, Jacksonville Jagwires 21. Can the Patriots be beaten? Sure. But not by these guys, at least not this year. The team that can beat them is playing elsewhere this weekend.
ACTUAL RESULT: EVIL EMPIRE 31, JAGS 20. Tom Brady may be smug, but he's an awfully good quarterback. After this weekend, they have to be prohibitive favorite to run the table. But I still have hope should my boys get to the Super Bowl.

Tony Dungy Nation 31, San Diego Chargers 23. The defending champions are still in the middle of Indiana. They will not relinquish their crown easily.
ACTUAL RESULT: BOLTS 28, COLTS 24. Best game of the weekend and quite a remarkable effort by the Chargers, who were running out of bullets but managed to survive. While I think that New England will handle them, they are a tough out.


Dan S. said...

I hope you're right, good sir. It would be refreshing to have each conference's championship game actually field its two best teams.

And my 'Boys got a hankerin' for another hunk of Cheese...

Mark said...

So yer 'Boys got a hankerin' for another hunk of Cheese, eh, Dan?

Since we're using song lyrics, here's another one

Well here's a poke at you
You're gonna choke on it too
You're gonna lose that smile
Because all the while. . . .

But we'll talk about that next time, right?


Uncle Ben said...

Who sang that? ;)

Anonymous said...

Uncle Ben, those lines are part of the Who's "I can See for Miles and Miles."

Since Mr D has already spoken of the Walrus, all I can say is Ku Ku Ca Choo. Both home teams in the NFC could lose this weekend. Wouldn't it be wild if instead of the much anticipated Deanna Farve vs. Kelly Clarkson/Jessica Simpson matchup with a little TO sprinkled on the side, we got Peyton Wannabee vs. The land that brought us Starbucks, Grunge and the stardon of Slick Watts?

The balls not round, and the weather is relatively warm but potentially snowy in Lambeau. Let the battles begin in the little brother's conference to see who gets to challenge the Great Satan.

Uncle Ben said...

Like I said, Who sang that! I never tire of that joke.

This year it would be pretty sweet for the favored teams to advance. It was such an unbalanced year that these four teams were clearly top of the pile all year long. Dallas, GB and NE, Indy need to advance to give us an incredible championship Sunday.

Mark said...

Hey Ben,

I got the joke. I'm guessing my anonymous commenter either doesn't get emoticons or was so hot to namecheck Slick Watts that he had no time for whimsy. And anyway, if we're namechecking old Sonics, my choice is eternally Downtown Fred Brown, famed for his long-range bombing and a Wisconsin native to boot.

One house rule 'round here - we always have time for whimsy at Mr. Dilettante!

My best to you and the Mall Diva!

Mr. D