Okay, old dude, I realize we're a little late to get these posted, but I was busy cheering the Irondale Knights on to victory last night. St. Francis tasted the sole of the Irondale boot, 20-13. And the Knights even rallied to win to make it dramatic.
Drama is good, young fella.
Drama isn't good in football, I say. I prefer butt-kickings, especially when it's my team doing the butt-kicking. Speaking of which, it's time I start kicking your butt on picks. Watch me work.
North Dakota State Bison (NL) vs. Minnesota Golden Gophers. Apparently the boys in Vegas don't know what to do about teams from the Dakotas, since there's no line for this game, or for the Badgers, but we'll get to that in a minute. The Gophers have some trouble with teams from North Dakota, South Dakota and maybe even Dakota Fanning. Jerry Kill understands this is a trap game, so he'll get his team ready. Gophers 49, NDSU 0.
I'll bet the Bison do better than that. They are a very good team at their level. But they are at a lower level. Gophs will win. Minnesota 27, North Dakota State 17.
South Dakota Wile E. Coyotes (NL) vs. Beloved Wisconsin Badgers. It never goes well for Wile E. Coyote in the cartoons. 'Nuff said. Bucky 83, Wile E. Coyote 17.
That could happen. South Dakota played fairly well last year against the Gophers and won. They aren't playing the Gophers this times. I expect a rout, too. Wisconsin 65, S. Dakota 14.
Detroit Motor City Kitties (-3 1/2) vs. Minnesota Vikings. Yep. It's true. The Vikings are a home underdog against the Detroit Lions. The Lions are putting all their eggs into their defensive line. So far, it's worked. Can the Vikings figure out a way to slow down Suh, Vanden Bosch and the rest of the gang? No. Lions 21, Vikings 17.
It's tough to tell if the Lions are really good or not. I'm not sure the Kansas City Chiefs were much of a test. The Vikings fit into Benster's favorite scenario, the desperate team at home. Interestingly, Benster ignored his own theory this time. I'm going to play a hunch. Vikings 24, Lions 20.
Glorious Green Bay Packers (-3 1/2) vs. Bear Down Chicago da Bearz. Speaking of home dogs, da Bearz find themselves in that position against our beloved World Champion Packers, who have been a little shaky on defense this year. I'm nervous about not having Nick Collins, who is a pretty crucial part of that defense. I also think we should send the Claymaker to Gabe Carimi's side of the Bears' offensive line, especially since Carimi won't be playing, most likely. I'm half expecting to see the Swinging Gate over there. Lovie Smith said his goal was to beat the Green Bay Packers. Well, he could have knocked the Packers out twice last season, but failed both times. World Champions 17, NFC North Division Winners (2010) 10.
Jay Cutler is getting his butt kicked every week. He's on pace to take 88 sacks. The Packers will blitz the Bears silly this game. The key will be if the Bears counter effectively with screen passes and other trickery. I suspect this will be a war, too. Packers 20, Bears 17.
I'd pick more games, but really, what's the point? I have to go out and give my pal Charley a shout-out for earning his Eagle Scout this morning, so I don't have time to pick more football games. And so that's what I'll do. Ben out!
Drama is good, young fella.
Drama isn't good in football, I say. I prefer butt-kickings, especially when it's my team doing the butt-kicking. Speaking of which, it's time I start kicking your butt on picks. Watch me work.
North Dakota State Bison (NL) vs. Minnesota Golden Gophers. Apparently the boys in Vegas don't know what to do about teams from the Dakotas, since there's no line for this game, or for the Badgers, but we'll get to that in a minute. The Gophers have some trouble with teams from North Dakota, South Dakota and maybe even Dakota Fanning. Jerry Kill understands this is a trap game, so he'll get his team ready. Gophers 49, NDSU 0.
I'll bet the Bison do better than that. They are a very good team at their level. But they are at a lower level. Gophs will win. Minnesota 27, North Dakota State 17.
South Dakota Wile E. Coyotes (NL) vs. Beloved Wisconsin Badgers. It never goes well for Wile E. Coyote in the cartoons. 'Nuff said. Bucky 83, Wile E. Coyote 17.
That could happen. South Dakota played fairly well last year against the Gophers and won. They aren't playing the Gophers this times. I expect a rout, too. Wisconsin 65, S. Dakota 14.
Detroit Motor City Kitties (-3 1/2) vs. Minnesota Vikings. Yep. It's true. The Vikings are a home underdog against the Detroit Lions. The Lions are putting all their eggs into their defensive line. So far, it's worked. Can the Vikings figure out a way to slow down Suh, Vanden Bosch and the rest of the gang? No. Lions 21, Vikings 17.
It's tough to tell if the Lions are really good or not. I'm not sure the Kansas City Chiefs were much of a test. The Vikings fit into Benster's favorite scenario, the desperate team at home. Interestingly, Benster ignored his own theory this time. I'm going to play a hunch. Vikings 24, Lions 20.
Glorious Green Bay Packers (-3 1/2) vs. Bear Down Chicago da Bearz. Speaking of home dogs, da Bearz find themselves in that position against our beloved World Champion Packers, who have been a little shaky on defense this year. I'm nervous about not having Nick Collins, who is a pretty crucial part of that defense. I also think we should send the Claymaker to Gabe Carimi's side of the Bears' offensive line, especially since Carimi won't be playing, most likely. I'm half expecting to see the Swinging Gate over there. Lovie Smith said his goal was to beat the Green Bay Packers. Well, he could have knocked the Packers out twice last season, but failed both times. World Champions 17, NFC North Division Winners (2010) 10.
Jay Cutler is getting his butt kicked every week. He's on pace to take 88 sacks. The Packers will blitz the Bears silly this game. The key will be if the Bears counter effectively with screen passes and other trickery. I suspect this will be a war, too. Packers 20, Bears 17.
I'd pick more games, but really, what's the point? I have to go out and give my pal Charley a shout-out for earning his Eagle Scout this morning, so I don't have time to pick more football games. And so that's what I'll do. Ben out!
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