Yes, I am still here after last week. And the Packers have nobody to blame but themselves. Also, Quay Walker isn't the only person to blame. That's all that needs to be said. We will be back.
Lotta work to do for the Packers. But we have other games to consider.
You picked right up on that, Geritol Fan! Meanwhile, the locals get their home playoff game, and I sense a lot of triumphalism amongst the local fans. That might not be the right thing. The one thing I can agree with Vikings fans on is that getting Correa back for the Twins is awesome, and sets the Twins up well to compete for the AL Central before they find some new and exciting ways to get swept out of the playoffs. But that is a topic for another day.
Soon enough.
I am feeling the HYYYYYPPPPPPPEEEEEEE!, and ready to pick some games. Watch me work.
Seattle Seachickens (+9.5) vs. San Francisco 49ers The Niners are the team that I wouldn't be sleeping on because they are very good at winning January games. I always knew that Brock Purdy was going to be a pretty good bet for the Niners, since they have enough talent around him where he isn't going to have to win the game on his own. The Seahawks deserve a lot of credit for getting in, and the Russell Wilson trade has been a complete win for them. They don't have to move on from Geno Smith. Yes, that is a reasonable take and one I never thought that I would say back in the spring. Combine that with the picks they got from Denver, maybe the Seahawks aren't that far away. It reminds me of when the Twins traded Johan Santana to the Mets back in 2008. The Twins won 2 more AL Central titles, and the Mets didn't get the pitcher that would take them over the top in the NL. I think San Francisco will avoid the dubious honor of being the first 2 seed to lose to a 7 seed, but this game will be closer than you think. Seahawks 26, Niners 23.
Uh, wait. If the Niners lose, they don't avoid the dubious honor.
I'm having fun. Try to keep up.
Okay, but I'm a fan of logic, which has never been a strong point in this feature. Anyway, happy enough for the Seabags, but the Niners are better. 49ers 27, Seahawks 18.
Los Angeles Chargers (-2.5) vs. Jacksonville Jaguars I'm going to be level with you guys. Doug Pederson should be named NFL Coach of the Year. With all due respect to Mr. KOC here in town, the Vikings weren't devoid of talent. The Jags winning the AFC South is crazy, and they have a great chance of winning this game. The Chargers have talent, but Brandon Staley is living proof that just because using math makes sense, you have to actually watch the games. In fact, all of the NFL analytics people should have to go through the combine and have to coach just so that they understand what you can't calculate. Also, the Chargers should move back to San Diego. Nobody in LA cares about them, and the NFL should remember that they don't need LA to succeed. Jaguars 19, Go Back To San Diego 18.
You know what that's about, right?
It's all about the money! And the Jaguars aren't about the money. El Lay is about the money, even if they don't give a damn about the Bolts. As for the game? Could be the best game of the weekend. Chargers 24, Jags 23.
Miami Tuna Net Victims (+13.5) vs. Buffalo Bills The Bills ended up winning last week in an emotional game, and Damar Hamlin is living proof that miracles can happen as he continues to make progress on his long road to recovery. The Dolphins are going to be outgunned in Buffalo, as no Tua means that they will need to play a perfect game and for the Bills to self destruct. I don't think the Bills are the best team in the AFC, and don't think they will win a Super Bowl with their current core, as the AFC is going to be a lot stronger for the next couple of years. But they will win comfortably. Bills 45, Sorry Charlie 0.
No Tua, no chance. Bills 31, Dolphins 14.
New York Giants (+3) vs. Minnesota Vikings So this is the first home playoff game for the Vikings since the Minneapolis Miracle. The Vikings beat the Giants, but needed to survive a late comeback and for Greg Joseph to hit a field goal at the gun on Christmas Eve. The good news is that Kirk will have a stronger offensive line, which has been half of the secret sauce for the Vikings this year. The other half has been KJ Osborn. Call me crazy, but it seems like the guy has taken the biggest leap of any Viking under the current regime, and in particular has been very good at making a big catch or two to start a Vikings drive. When I was at the Colts game, he was the unsung hero that started the comeback. But this Giants team shouldn't be underestimated. I think the Giants will make it interesting, but the Vikings will pull the last bit of pixie dust they have to win the game in some crazy way after giving every single Vikings fans a scare. Vikings 31, Giants 28, in 3OT.
Three overtimes? What in the name of Ed Podolak are you talking about? Vikings will win but will increase Tums consumption in town exponentially in the process. Vikings 34, Giants 30.
Baltimore Ravens (+8.5) vs. Cincinnati Bungles No Lamar is going to hurt the Ravens, but they do a good job at staying competitive without him. The Bengals are probably the best team in the AFC, and looked primed to take the next step. But beating a divisional rival is going to be tough, and this game will be your classic AFC North rockfight. If the Ravens can keep it close, then the Bengals fans might get nervous, as they are used to their team choking. Bengals 21, Ravens 10.
I am still trying to figure out how the Ravens made the playoffs. I know how Cincinnati did it. And that makes all the difference. Bengals 31, Ravens 17.
Dallas How Bout Them Cowboys (-2.5) vs. Tampa Bay Bucs I'll be perfectly honest, both these teams annoy me and I want them to both lose. The Cowboys are my second least favorite team in the NFL, and I find their fanbase and media mouthpieces to be quite annoying like all right thinking Americans. As for the Bucs, I really dislike Gisele's ex and his band of merry men that all happen to be under the salary cap. The Bucs only are here because they play in the godawful NFC South, which deserves to have their playoff berth taken away from them. Was it really worth it, Gisele's ex? At least the Cowboys are here on merit. All I ask for is one of these teams to lose in a hilarious way, and for the winner of this game to get eliminated next week for the greater good. Bucs -400, Cowboys -401.
You know what would be hilarious? If Mike McCarthy lets the Bucs hang around long enough for Brady to beat him at the end. Tragedy tomorrow, comedy tonight!
Enjoy your football this week. Ben out.
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