Friday, January 12, 2024

Benster and D Pick Your Games-------Packers Haters In Shambles Edition

Remember when everyone said that the Packers were going to be going into the wilderness and that Jordan Love was going to be a massive bust? Pepperidge Farm remembers. 

Certain parts of the Upper Midwest are hotbeds of wishful thinking, especially where football is concerned. 

In other news, I wasn't fired by anyone nor am I announcing my retirement in what will be the craziest offseason of coaching changes that I have ever seen. 

Yeah, it's quite the coaching carousel this year. And the fun is just beginning.

I am feeling the HYYYYYYYYYPPPEEEEE! and ready to pick some games. Watch me work.

Cleveland Browns (-2) vs. Houston Texans Big credit to the Texans for being here. I always liked CJ Stroud at Ohio State, and he was able to help turn around a frankly awful Texans team into division champions. The Browns have been up and down all year, but somehow Joe Flacco was able to come out of the wilderness and take the Browns to January football. Don't forget that Flacco is a Super Bowl winning quarterback, which is something that few other teams have. The Browns have a defense that will play well, and are a sleeper team to watch. Don't be surprised if they make a deep run. Browns 21, Texans 10.

I sure enjoyed watching Stroud this year in the few chances I had to see him. The Texans are in their customary playoff spot - first game of Wild Card Weekend. They are at home. But the Browns are better. That's a sentence I haven't had to type in a long time. Browns 24, Texans 20.

Miami Dolphins (+4.5) vs. Taylor Swift Eras Tour Kansas City Chiefs This game shouldn't be on Peacock. It's not the NFL's fault that Comcast failed at creating a streaming service that nobody asked for, and whoever came up with this idea should be ashamed of themselves. Also, the weather in Kansas City is going to be awfully cold, and I wouldn't attend that game if you paid me. The Chiefs have issues with catching balls, and this is the type of weather that is going to cause drops. So while the Dolphins are going to be wishing that they could go back to South Beach, this is a game that they are going to win. The worst thing is that Mahomie has a contract that is going to be a big hinderance to keeping talent, and the Chiefs front office has to nail every pick in the draft going forward. Dolphins 60, Chiefs 34.

Somewhere a songstress is distressed:

Dammit, Benster!

Keep it up and she might write a song about you, pal. As for the game, I'm not buying what you're selling. Both of these teams are inconsistent, but the Chiefs have a track record of winning in Kansas City at this time of year. I suspect that continues, even though I have my misgivings. Chiefs 27, Dolphins 24.

Pittsburgh Yinzers (+9.5) vs. Buffalo 13 Seconds The Steelers being here amazes me, and can only be described as Mike Tomlin having some sort of luck modifier. The Steelers offense is a mess, no TJ Watt, and they win games thanks to their stars bailing them out after giving the Yinzers heart attacks every other week. But they got in, and that's all you can ask. This game is going to be in awful weather as well, and should be a good old fashioned rock fight. As for the Bills, it's clear that Sean McDermott needs to just let the Bills play. They have all the weapons, but for some reason there is something off about the Bills this year. Josh Allen needs this one, or there are going to be some uncomfortable questions asked about if the Bills core is the right one, or if their steakhouse menu needs to be changed. Never forget the steakhouse metaphor. Bills 7, Steelers 6.

It's more of a wings joint, but that's okay. Bills should win easily. It won't be easy. Bills 24, Steelers 20.

Glorious Green Bay Packers (+7) vs. Dallas How Bout Them Cowboys The Packers being here is the best coaching and management job that this organization has done in my time being a fan of the team. Jordan Love answered every single question asked of him and more, this team is young and only going to get better, and no matter what happens on Sunday this season has been a success by all reasonable metrics. The Cowboys have all of the pressure on them. If they don't make the NFC title game and end that drought, Jerry will make changes. I've sensed a little bit of nerves from Cowboys fans and their media enablers, but regardless this will require the Packers to play their best game of the year. But you know that I am a delusional homer and back the Packers no matter the odds. Packers 33, Cowboys 23.

About two months ago, we were ready to fire everyone. Things have changed pretty substantially and you do have to give credit to the Packers for sticking with their plan. The reward is probably going to be a short visit to the playoffs, but I like the Packers to make the Cowboys nervous. Cowboys 31, Packers 27.

Los Angeles Rams (+3) vs. Detroit LOLions The funny thing about this game is that Matthew Stafford will be playing quarterback at the first playoff game at Ford Field. Little did anyone guess that he will be making his return to Detroit as the visiting quarterback. The Lions are good, and deserved to win the division as they were the most consistent team in the NFC North. However, the next step is that they need to win a playoff game, and that has been a challenge. My issue with Dan Campbell is that while I get why he does things the way he does, his coaching style costs the Lions at times. People want to complain about the Cowboys ending a couple weeks ago, but Campbell left points on the board by being aggressive, and that is going to come back to haunt him against a team in the Rams that have a Super Bowl pedigree and are looking to spoil the Lions getting their moment. Oh well, you at least have Michigan? Rams 21, LOLions Gonna LOLions 0.

It's easy to forget the Rams won the Super Bowl fairly recently. They have done a nice job of retooling and this will be a tough one for the Lions. But I do think they have it in them to win. Lions 35, Rams 28.

Philadelphia Eagles (-3) vs. Tampa Bay Bucs Honestly, the Eagles are looking like the Phillies last fall. If you remember, the Phillies were talking a lot of stuff about how they were going to overcome losing the World Series, and ended up losing to a D-Backs team that was young and hungry after a collapse that looks obvious in hindsight but was ignored by the baseball community. The Eagles collapse is real, and honestly I think that this team can't fight their way out of trouble. The Bucs are hungry, and are a team that I feel is getting overlooked. They have a quarterback in Baker Mayfield who is looking to prove the doubters wrong, a defense that will play well on any stage, and are looking to prove that they didn't win their ring by just getting Gisele's ex and his merry band of football mercenaries who all somehow fit under the salary cap. Bucs 40, Die Eagles Die 0.

The Eagles are talented but dysfunctional. The Bucs are limited but organized. I tend to agree with your assessment, if not your score. Bucs 24, Eagles 19.

Enjoy your football this weekend. Ben out. 

1 comment:

Brad Carlson said...

Remember when everyone said that the Packers were going to be going into the wilderness and that Jordan Love was going to be a massive bust?

Yup. Specifically myriad callers to the WTMJ Packers postgame show after their Week 8 home loss to the Vikings.