Our Betters in the News

A quick swing through the internet this morning reveals that, even in a time when justice is being restored to America, there might be a few speed bumps in the path to Change You Can Believe In®.

• The Washington Post is reporting that the nomination of Eric Holder to de-Albertoize the Justice Department has hit a snag. Oddly, it seems that there are some concerns being raised about Mr. Holder's role in the delivery of justice for Marc Rich and the news that Mr. Holder has been seen consorting with the inconvenient Rod Blagojevich. It's possible that the evil Mitch McConnell might raise a few impertinent questions during the hearings that are scheduled for this week. No word yet if Holder will be martyred, although this might provide the perfect opportunity for the president-elect to demonstrate the political savvy that he gained in his rise through the Cook County Graduate School of Government Management. In the interest of ensuring a brighter future, I propose a job switch -- promote Patrick Fitzgerald to Attorney General and put Holder in as U.S. Attorney in Chicago. I bet Mr. Holder could resolve the investigations in Illinois quite expeditiously.
• Turns out the the Mayor of Baltimore, Sheila Dixon, has been indicted on a variety of lurid charges, the most enterprising of which is the theft of donated gift cards meant for the poor. The Washington Post has the details, including her political affiliation in the 10th paragraph should you be interested enough to know that. I take this development as good news: it's a sign of our political and social progress that now an African-American woman can rise to power in one of our greatest cities and can use her office, prestige and high station as a means to steal from her constituents, just like so many of her forbears.
• Meanwhile, the second most powerful politician left in Illinois has now been impeached by the state house. The vote was 114-1. Southwest Side representative Milt Patterson cast the lone dissenting vote after consulting with his political advisor Andy Warhol. Now begins the real game of chicken, in which the state Senate tries to weigh the relative risk of bringing the miscreant governor to justice, while wondering if they should act before he finishes his conference call with the avenging Fitzgerald. In game theory, they call this the Prisoner's Dilemma. In Chicago, they call this politics as usual.

Cross-posted at Truth vs. the Machine