Benster and D Pick Your Games -- Turkey That Doesn't Bring Down Russian Fighter Planes Edition

Old dude, it's a time filled with traditions. Including one of my personal favorites:

The best part is glob of paprika at the bottom of the taters

Yes, the LOLions get to show why they are so worthy of LOL today. But there's more happening than just the LOLions.

You mean this guy?

Back for a visit

Yes, ol' number 4 is back to get his number retired. And all of the four greatest quarterbacks in Packer history will be on hand -- Aaron Rodgers, Bart Starr, Brett Favre and this guy:

Enjoying a commemorative Newport Light for the occasion

That will be festive.

Yep -- so festive that I barely need to break out the HYYYYPPPPPE! So let's get on with it. Watch me work!

Philadelphia Iggles (pick) vs. Detroit LOLions. As is tradition, the LOLions kick off the turkey day festivities in their well-padded mausoleum in downtown Detroit. Actually, the Lions have been playing a little better lately. Did you notice that they are on a winning streak? That will end pretty soon, but will it be today? The Eagles have been a dumpster fire all year but are still in contention in the pathetic NFC East. They don't trust Sam Bradford at all, but they aren't really ready to concede the need to use Mark (the Sanchize) Sanchez yet again. Eagles 49, LOLions 0.

Using history as a guide, I see. For two bad teams, this could actually be an entertaining game. I don't expect to see much defense and both teams can score, although sometimes they don't. The Eagles are indeed a dumpster fire, but those do provide a bit of warmth. Lions 27, Eagles 24.

Bear Down Chicago da Bearz (+8.5) vs. Glorious Green Bay Packers. So how cool is this -- a Thanksgiving Day game at Lambeau? Against the ancient rivals? With Brett Favre getting his jersey retired? It's pretty cool, Geritol Fan! The Packers won a huge game on Sunday and seem to have righted the ship a bit. However, this game is going to be close because da Bearz have improved and will get Matt Forte back, it appears. John Fox is a doing a good job of restoring fundamentals and competence to the Bears. Will that be enough to win in this game? With all the glories and ghosts coming out? Packers 30, da Bearz 27.

If the Packers play like they did in Minneapolis, this will be easy. If they play like they did against the Lions two weeks ago, look out. The young fella is right -- the Bears are improving. Still, I wonder about their ability to play defense, because I don't see a lot of difference makers on that side of the ball. I think the Packers use the emotion and pull away in the second half. Packers 34, Bears 20.

Minnesota Vikings (+2) vs. Hotlanta Falcons. The Vikings lost last week and this game becomes an interesting test. The Falcons are reeling right now and have not played well for at least a month. Still, they are dangerous and have a lot of weapons. The encouraging thing for the Vikings is that they hung in there last week and have been showing signs that they are catching up offensively. That should be enough. Vikings 27, Falcons 18.

This game is interesting. We have the favorite thing for this feature -- a desperate team at home. The Falcons are in a lot of trouble right now and they have to get things straightened out. The Vikings present a tough challenge, especially on defense. The matchup to watch is Julio Jones vs. Xavier Rhodes. If Julio gets rolling, the Vikings are in trouble. Falcons 31, Vikings 28.

Beloved Wisconsin Badgers (-2.5) vs. Minnesota Golden Gophers. The Axe is on the line, but that's not all. The Gophers have to win to secure a bowl bid. Things have gone wrong for both of these programs this year and injuries are the primary reason. The Badgers can't run the ball that well, which has not been the case for nearly 25 years, while the Gophers have been hit with injuries on offense, defense, special teams and even in Pioneer Hall on campus. It's been bizarre, actually. Thankfully, whoever wins the Axe can forget about that. Badgers 21, Gophers 20.

If the Gophers are going to win the Axe, this is the year. The Badgers got absolutely jobbed last week and they will be an angry bunch. The Gophers really need this game, though, so I think this one goes the other way. Gophers 21, Badgers 20.

The Ohio State University Buckeyes (+2) vs. Meeeshegan Figthin' Harbaughs. So the Buckeyes soiled the bed last week against Sparty and now their glittering season could go up in smoke. Jim Harbaugh is no stranger to this game and he knows how to get his game up for a big game. Meanwhile, the Buckeyes are trying to sort out a lot of dissension in the ranks. You have drunk quarterbacks and bitter running backs and star defenders who get too many penalties. It's not a good formula for winning the one game that Ohio State fans want to win every single year. Michigan 35, Oh No 7.

Oh no? Uh, no. While Michigan has improved, there's still a talent gap involved and the Buckeyes really have to have this game. They'll find a way, despite it all. Ohio State 27, Michigan 21.

Happy thanksgiving, everyone! And, as God is my witness, I though turkeys could fly. But that's because I've seen too many LOLions games on Thanksgiving. Ben out!