Old dude, the good news is that Facebook and Twitter can't suspend this feature. I mean, it's not like taking shots at football teams breaks any rules. But if A School in Columbus takes over social media, then I am screwed.
Facebook and Twitter, no. But I continue to keep my head on a swivel.
Well, the Packers get a week off to chill out, and hopefully all the NFC games go into overtime. And by overtime, I mean multiple overtimes.
Can they play until Tuesday? That would be good.
I am feeling the HYYYYYYYPPPEEEEE!, and it is time to watch me work.
Indianapolis Colts (+6.5) vs. Buffalo Bills The Bills probably are the one team that can beat the Chiefs on the AFC side. But they haven't won a playoff game since the 1990s, and they really need this one badly. The Colts have a good formula for winning, and Phillip Rivers is probably on his last ride. I would expect JT to control the clock, and the Bills will have to take all of their chances on offense to win. If the Bills don't win, then serious questions have to be asked about their core. But thankfully the Bills have the better team and this is the week they can celebrate a playoff win. Nobody Circles The Wagons Like The Buffalo Bills 28, Colts 7.
If the Colts can play keep away, they have a chance. Buffalo will miss their fans in the stands for sure. But I agree, the Bills are the better team. Bills 28, Colts 20.
Los Angeles Less Annoying Showtime on Turf (+3) vs. Seattle Seachickens The Rams have major question marks at quarterback. Jared Goff might go, but he is probably going to have some trouble with the thumb. The Rams are the real Showtime in LA, and the reason I say it is because they don't have the annoying bandwagon fanbase the Fakers Lakers have and also don't have LeBron James. The Seahawks won't have the aid of their Microsoft and Boeing bro fanbase, but they are experienced and haven't lost a home playoff game in quite a while. As much as it would crack me up to see Cheat Carroll lose, his team is too talented and the Rams are too inconsistent week to week. Are There Real Seachicken Fans? 25, Rams 0.
I tend to agree with this assessment as well. You're being remarkably level-headed this week? Do you need some of my Geritol? Seahawks 24, Rams 21.
Tompa Bay Bucs (-7.5) vs. Washington Name Redacted The Name Redacted is an amazing story, and deserve a lot of props for being here. Yes, they may have won a horrible excuse of a division in the NFC Least, and did get help from the Eagles screwing over the Giants. Seriously, that ticked me off. The only reason I am not doing a Very Special Comment on benching Hurts is because I have to save it for another game. Riverboat Ron beat cancer during a year where it was very scary to have cancer, and Alex Smith is deservedly Comeback Player of the Year for showing the mental strength to get back on the football field after what he went through. The Bucs are inconsistent, and I think they will struggle to keep Brady upright. Look for the Name Redacted to pull the upset. Oh, and get ready for sports talk shows to endlessly debate who won the Brady divorce for the 1000th time this year. Name Redacted 17, Tompa Bay 8.
Another cogent analysis. I think the Bucs win it late, but I would not be surprised if the WFT knocks Brady out of the game early and takes it. Buccaneers 20, WFT 16.
Baltimore Ravens (-3.5) vs. Tennessee Titans This game is a rematch of the stunning upset in Baltimore last year, and there is more pressure on the Ravens than the Titans. Lamar Jackson is a great player, there is no doubt about that. The problem is that he has yet to win a playoff game, and really blew a golden chance last year in light of the Patriots being knocked out the week before. If the Ravens lose this game, then Lamar might need to be considered for replacement. There, I said it. The Titans didn't impress me when they were up at Lambeau, but they can run the clock, and Derrick Henry is still a beast. The Titans know their identity better than just about anyone in the league, and should win a home playoff game for the first time in a while. Remember the Titans 35, Ravens 10.
It took a while, but you finally made a ridiculous observation in re Jackson. I knew you had it in you! The Titans are not good on defense. This will be a shootout. Ravens 40, Titans 34.
Bear Down Chicago Da Bearz Still Suck (+10) vs. New Orleans Blame The Refs Da Bearz backed into the playoffs, and even Gino would agree with me on that one. As a Packers fan, nothing would please me more than ownership extending Ted Phillips, Ryan Pace, Matt Nagy, and Mitch Trubisky. All four of them have done a great job this year, and really have the Bears going in the right direction. As for the Saints, this probably is the last ride for Drew Brees, and the Alvin Kamara story will be monitored up until game time. The fact that this game is on Nickelodeon is just hilarious. The Saints should win this game, unless the refs find a way to screw them over again. Saints 70, Da Bearz Still Suck 0.
SpongeDrew SquareBrees vs. da Bearz. It's only sad the NFL didn't think of this while Sid and Marty Krofft were prowling the airwaves.
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Archie Manning and Bears Coach Abe Gibron, pregame 1973 |
The Bears aren't very good, either, but one exceptionally weird thing seems to happen in every Wildcard Round. So, even though I have no reason to believe this will actually happen... Bears 20, Saints 17.
Cleveland Browns (+6) vs. Pittsburgh Yinzers That's not a misprint. The Browns actually made the playoffs. But unfortunately they are playing without several key players and their head coach. As for the Steelers, they are fully rested after sitting their stars against the Browns last week. However, there are problems for the Steelers. Their defense has some depth issues, and Big Ben has clearly started to decline this year down the stretch. Also, when did JuJu turn into such a diva? The guy was likeable his first two years in the league, but has now been dancing on logos and making himself a target of ire for opposing defenses. It's clear that the Steelers might not have been as good as we thought earlier this year. If the Steelers were to lose, then it would be hilarious and I probably would listen to Pittsburgh sports radio for the meltdowns. Browns 20, This Week On Days Of Our Steelers 17.
The Browns are getting bit by the COVID bug. That will be enough to derail them, unfortunately. Steelers 24, Browns 20.
A School In Columbus (+8) vs. Alabama Crimson Tide, in South Florida Before the axe gets used, some praise towards Alabama. Don't worry Tide fans, you did nothing wrong. This might be the best team Nick Saban has worked with, and probably the best Alabama team of all time if you go back. They have no weaknesses, and I'm honestly impressed. I've been critical of Saban before, but this time I'm rooting for him heavily with a hazmat suit and a strong need to take a shower after the game. It's time for a Very Special Comment.
This should be a fun game, but only one team can say that they actually got there entirely without help from above. I find it hilarious that some of the Buckeye fans on the internet believe these outlandish conspiracy theories on how ESPN, the SEC, the ACC, and me are out to get them and hinder them when they brush under the rug that they got here in part because the Big Ten overturned their dumb 6 game rule. It's too late to change it now, but I have one thing to say. Barry Alvarez went to bat for the Buckeyes in their hour of need. If at any time in the future the Badgers need lobbying to get into the playoff, I expect Gene Smith to do the same thing willingly to repay his debt. You can say I should be rooting for the Buckeyes because of Big Ten honor. Well, that's not how it works. I'm rooting for Alabama. Do you know how terrible that is? I really dislike Alabama, but at least the one good thing I can say is that the SEC never overturned rules during the season to benefit the Tide. If you need a rule change during the season to even get to the title game, then that's not a title earned. The Big Ten pulled a move by doing this that made Vince McMahon think that it was too scripted. The football gods see all, and their justice will be coming.
I think the Tide should just dominate because they are better. Also, it's a shame because Ohio State actually has a likeable team this year. Nothing against the players or coaching staff. My beef is with those above them. Roll Tide 150, IU Got Screwed 0.
IU lost to Ole Miss. The Hoosiers didn't get screwed -- they are a nice team that, in a different year, would have been playing in the Duke's Mayo Bowl. As for this game, I agree -- this is as formidable an Alabama team as I have seen. Buckeyes are worthy, but they won't be able to hang with the Tide. Alabama 45, Ohio State 31.
Enjoy your football this weekend. Ben out.
Update from D: Brad Carlson's picks for Saturday are here.