Friday, January 15, 2010

Benster and D Pick Your Games -- Divisional Round


It's time to bring out the BIG DAWGS. We are no longer messing around, children. Can you feel the HYYYYYYYYPPPPPPPE!

I'm not sure what I'm feeling. My ears are ringing after that blast of hype. Maybe a smidge of fear?

There's no time for fear, Decrepit! Underdog is Here! That old school stuff ought to reassure you. Or do you need to head out for the Early Bird Special?

Too late for that, Seabiscuit.

Of course. It's time to get down to bidness. Roll those picks!

Arizona House of Cards (+7) vs New Orleans Unstoppable Offensive Juggernaut (Except for Recently). Down in Saints country, they have a little cheer that I will recount for you. Who Dat? Who dey think they can beat the Saints? Arizona somehow managed to survive a comeback from Aaron Rodgers and steal a win in the desert last week. New Orleans is on a 3-game losing streak, but the game is in New Orleans, which is one of the most intimidating places to play in the National Football League. Make sure you click that link -- it will put you in the mood for the epic football action that will be taking place in the Superdome. Anyway, both teams can score at any moment, so the game will be decided on the turnover battle. And look for Karlos Dansby to deliver the blow. Cardinals 84, Hurricane Brees 77.

Benster? Okay, let's take a deep breath here. These teams will score. I agree. Heck, the Cardinals put up 51 points last weekend. But I don't see them scoring 84. In fact, I don't see them winning this game. New Orleans is built for this moment and they will take it. I don't doubt that they will struggle, and it's awfully hard to pick against Kurt Warner based on what we saw last week. But I'm going to anyway. Drew Brees is ready and I think they'll have enough energy to handle the Cardinals. Saints 41, Cardinals 34.

Charm City Birds (+6 1/2) vs. Indianapolis Mannings. It's very obvious to see that both teams are extremely young at the skill positions. Sure, Peyton Manning is in his 30s now and probably heading toward a midlife crisis, which I'm sure he'll have turned into a series of credit card commercials, but he's a Superfreak. He's Superfreaky. Yow. Anyway, the Ravens last week ran all over the Patriots like it was going out of style. Last year the Ravens went into Nashville and beat the Titans, who were the #1 seed in 2008. I think the Ravens have discovered a key to beating high-powered offensive teams, by keeping the opposing offense off the field. And they will do it again this week. Charm City Birds 30, Mannings 19.

Bold pick, Grasshopper! And again I can see your logic. The Colts won a lot of games this season in highly fortunate ways. Peyton Manning was unbelievably good throwing to various guys named after cities in Texas and some French dude who I think was Klondike Kat's enemy. It was really amazing when you think about it. But the key to this game is going to be defense. Can the Colts play enough of it to stop Baltimore's Ray Rice? I don't think so. I'm going to agree with the young fella. Baltimore 27, Indianapolis 24.

Dallas How 'Bout Them Cowboahs (-3) vs. Minnesota Skol Vikings. Guess who's back in the playoffs? Brett Lorenzo Fav-ray, or as we disaffected Packer fans call him, Benedict Brent. Minnesota comes in playing hot, but Dallas was even hotter. Tony Romo might have won last week, but the jury is still out on him and Roy "Wait a minute, am I supposed to catch that?" Williams. We haven't had any Jessica Simpson sightings here in the Twin Cities this week, so I don't think young Tony will be distracted by the ladies. Antoine Winfield will have to deal with "I Can See for" Miles Austin. I know the Dome will be rocking because I've been there for a Twins playoff game and the joint is louder than loud. You can here the noise for miles and miles. Oh yeah. Skol Vikings 30, Cowboahs 7.

As the young fella points out, Tony Romo won't let Jessica Simpson distract him this weekend. Which is a good thing, because I have the sense that Jared Allen is going to have a great game and Romo had better be ready. As a Packer fan in Minnesota, it's always amusing to watch how Vikings fans turn what should be a happy event into a festival of worrying and angst. Half of the fans I've talked to are convinced that the Ghost of Drew Pearson or something will smite their beloved purple-clad heroes and all the fun they've had this season will turn to ashes. Not. Going. To. Happen. Favre may not be good enough to run the table against future foes, but he's good enough to beat Tony Romo. Look for the Vikings to score early, set the tempo and keep Dallas from doing what they do best. Vikings 31, Cowboys 26.

New York J-E-T-S JETS JETS JETS (+7) vs. San Diego Bolts. So, it's the little engine that could going up against the hottest team in the league. On the road, too. Last week the Bengals didn't even show up again and the Jets won rather easily. However, Phillip Rivers is proving to be a smart pickup for my fantasy league team and a Top 5 quarterback. I do not see Vincent Jackson getting shut down by Darrelle Revis the way that Ochenta y Cinco did. Look for the Green and White to be black and blue by the end of this one. Usain Bolts 63, Gang Green 2.

This seems like the easiest game of the weekend to pick. The Jets have played well down the stretch, but they aren't even close to the Chargers, talent-wise. Rivers has quietly put together a fantastic season and he has a wide array of weapons to choose from. Vincent Jackson is only one of them. He also happens to have Ladanian Tomlinson, one of the 5 best running backs in the history of the game, on his side, too. Tomlinson is looking for his Walter Paytonesque Super Bowl moment this year. And I suspect he'll have a chance to get it. And Norv Turner won't forget to give him the ball with a chance to score like Ditka did with Payton. And the Jets are merely a speed bump. Chargers 34, Jets 14.

I probably picked two of the more bold picks that I've ever made. But remember this -- the Benster has mad skills. Don't look back. Something might be gaining on you. Ben out!

2 comments:

Gino said...

I'm going with the home teams to win this week.

Anonymous said...

We're the Houston Oilers ... Houston Oilers No. 1.