Friday, January 22, 2010

Benster and D Pick Your Games -- Conference Championship Round


It's conference championship week. Can you feel the HYYYYYYPPPPPEEE! Of course you can. How could you not feel it?


I don't know what I feel. But I do know that my ears are numb from all the shouting of HYYYYPPPPPPE! that you do 'round here, Seabiscuit!


You stole my line, Decrepit! C'mon, man! Anyway, let's get down to bidness:


New York J-E-T-S JETS JETS JETS (+7 1/2) vs. Indianapolis Mannings. Of the four teams still standing, the Jets are the least likely team to get to this point. I was very surprised that the Bolts failed to git 'er done against Mark Sanchez and the rest of his green-clad crew of misfits. Rex Ryan, the Jets coach, has said that his team was out of the race and that after the Jets made the playoffs, that they were going to hoist the Lombardi Trophy. It looks like he should be on a Coors Light commercial some day. Look for Indianapolis to try and get points on the board early and force Sanchez to win the game himself. Colts 35, Gang Green 30.


Okay, so let's look at what we have. On one side you have the aforementioned Mr. Sanchez, a hotshot rookie quarterback who makes some plays. On the other, Titan of Commerce Peyton Manning, the go-to-guy for half the companies in America for deadpan commerical fun. And he also works for Japanese companies, too. But what he really works on is opposing secondaries. I've seen it argued that Manning might be the greatest quarterback of all time. He could go a long way towards proving that by winning this game. And I suspect he will, although the pesky Jets will make him earn it. Colts 27, Jets 20.


Minnesota Skol Vikings (+3 1/2) vs. New Orleans Brees. This should be the best game of the playoffs. Both teams have solid veteran quarterbacks, dangerous running backs and explosive wideouts. Both teams also have very good defenses. Hurricane Brees will be a challenge for our intrepid Norsemen, especially since both Ray Edwards and Kevin Williams will be limited in what they can do. That means the Saints can work on Jared "Mullet" Allen, who can sack you and look like Billy Ray Cyrus at the same time. And we all know how painful that can be; ask Aaron Rodgers and Allen "Swinging Gate" Barbre. Brett Favre came back to try and get a ring. He might get it, but look for him to have to try and go gunslinger. And we all know what happens when he goes gunslinger. Saints 84, Skol Vikings 70.


So how do you sort these two teams out. Quarterbacks? Both awfully good. Running games? Both very good. Defenses? Both very good, too. There's a reason why these two teams are in the NFC championship game. They deserve to be. My guess is this: it's going to be more or less a standoff in normal play, but the special teams are where the difference is going to be made. Here's the thing: Percy Harvin has headaches, while Reggie Bush causes headaches. And if Harvin cannot answer the bell (and based on what I've heard, it's about a 50/50 shot that he won't), figure the Saints have the advantage. If Harvin can play, then give the special teams advantage to the Vikings, since Ryan Longwell is perhaps the top clutch kicker in the league. Of course, Vikings fans were saying the same thing about their kicker in 1998. As for Favre? He could throw the killer pick and break your heart, but I'm guessing he won't get the chance because the matter will be decided earlier. Saints 37, Vikings 27.


So you're saying that Percy Harvin is a better return man than Reggie Bush?


No, what I'm saying is that a healthy Reggie Bush might make the difference.


Just remember: Reggie Bush has a Heisman. And he can run. But he can't avoid the HYYYYYPPPPPPE! Ben out!

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