We don't fly a lot of Confederate battle flags in Minnesota, so it's tough to remove them from public property. But it's always important to keep up with the Joneses in the moral vanity game, so we're now seeing a renewed effort to get the name of Lake Calhoun changed, because it was named after John C. Calhoun, who was a slave owner and defender of the practice at a time when such beliefs were common. We gotta do something, after all.
Calhoun wasn't a very nice guy, so I suppose we could change the name, but if we're in the business of revoking honorifics for people who are on the outs with our contemporary sensibilities, we really ought to do something about Xerxes Avenue while we're at it.
Of course removing the offensive name is only half the fun. The real fun is to bestow the new name. Not surprisingly, most of the suggested new names for Lake Calhoun belong to politicians with the proper sensibilities -- Humphrey, Wellstone, like that. I'm guessing we can come up with something better, though. Here are a few choices, or add your own in the comments:
9 comments:
Lake Look At Us, We're So Good- Unlike Those Other White People!
Admittedly, it is unwieldy.
So how about: Lake Naalowp?
Not at all like other white people.
So how about: Lake Naalowp?
Not at all like other white people.
That's pretty good.
How about Lake Foff? You give these liberals one stupid thing, and they'll be right back with something even more outlandish, like requiring all fish to be read their rights before being pulled out of the water.
Thanks and all, but I'm holding out for Lake Superior to renamed in my honor. Always go big ya know...
Lake Che Guevara has a ring to it. Of course, it would be shortened in common usage to "Lake Che", which would sound like "leche", the Spanish word for "milk", which is what the Left likes to do with any issue where it can inflate its moral superiority (though the effort is somewhat akin to a fart in a pair of bike shorts).
The great lake they call Gitche-Gino!
Thankfully bike shorts breathe, though I guess the chamois that cushions the crotch might bulge out temporarily. :^)
And I think we ought to rename everything that's named after a sinner. We would then have 50 states named Jesus, every lake and river would be named Jesus.....and maybe to change things up, we'd have the "Holy Spirit" mountains. That'll do the trick. Mapmaking will be a cinch, but getting around a little more problematic.
In that case, Mexicans are well on their way toward righteousness with every third one of them bearing that name.
No, Gino, it's gotta be place names. Besides, the English name "Joshua" is from the same Hebrew word as the Spanish "Jesus". So we're rocking that vibe, too.
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