Benster and D Pick Your Games -- I Told You So Edition

I told you the Packers were going to go down to Chicago and beat the Bears.

You did. And you were right. How about that?

I don't just bring HYYYYYYPPPPPE! I also bring knowledge from a higher plain.

Columbia Heights?

No, I shared it with Marianne Williamson.

Crystal blue persuasion, then.

I have no idea what you're talking about. As usual. You might want to adjust that Geritol dosage there, old dude. But although my wisdom is well demonstrated, we have more games to pick. Watch me work!

Minnesota Golden Elite Rowers of the Boat (-3) vs. Fresno State Bulldogs. The Gophers have paddled their boat out to an arid agricultural area, Fresno. This is the type of game the Gophers can lose. The crowd at Fresno is loud, obnoxious, and inebriated, and the Bulldogs are actually pretty good at football. Bulldogs 35, Row Row Row Your Boat Elitely 10.

The knock on Jeff Tedford is that his system is good for tricking people, but when the talent differential is sufficient, his bag of tricks doesn't work. Are the Gophers talented enough to avoid getting turned into a bag of pistachios? We're gonna find out. Gophers 24, Fresno 21.

Central Michigan Chippewas (+35) vs. Beloved Wisconsin Badgers.  The Badgers looked like a machine against South Florida last week. The encouraging sign was Jonathan Taylor getting involved in the passing game. Two catches? Two touchdowns. Meanwhile, he rushed for his usual 100+ and two more touchdowns, and then he took most of the second half off. The Chips are historically a solid MAC team, but last year, not so much. I like the Badgers in this one, not surprisingly. Badgers 42, Chips 17.

Bucky was shockingly good against South Florida, a team that has been bowling in recent years. The thing that impressed me the most was the defense, which shut the Bulls down completely. The Bulls are more talented than the Chippewas, so this could get ugly. Badgers 50, Chippewas 0.

Knox College Prairie Fire (NL) vs. Eureka College Red Devils. It's the fabled Lincoln Bowl game, in which my beloved Prairie Fire takes on Eureka, the alma mater of one Ronald Reagan. Unfortunately for the Red Devils, Ronald Reagan is not walking through that door. Of course, since he's been dead for 15 years, he hasn't been particularly ambulatory lately. Knox 21, Eureka 14.

I have no idea. I have no idea. Did I mention I have no idea? Eureka 21, Knox 14.

Hotlanta Falcons (+4) vs. Minnesota Vikings. The Vikings come into this season with a lot of hope and question marks. One thing that confuses me to no end is why Gary Kubiak is not the offensive coordinator when Mike Zimmer wants to run Kubiak's offense? Is it because Zimmer needs to spend more time working with his beloved double A gap defensive system? Or is it that he wants to reserve the right to fire yet another offensive coordinator, with Kevin Stefanski in the always-molten chair. Regardless of what you think, this year will tell a lot about the Vikings. I think they can beat Atlanta, but I'm not certain that will happen. Falcons 27, Vikings 24.

The Vikings are hard to gauge. They will defend, as has been the pattern under Zimmer, but will they be able to score? Kirk Cousins is, well, enigmatic. But I think Good Kirk shows up this week. Vikings 31, Falcons 20.

It should be an interesting weekend. My recommend is to avoid going downtown on Sunday. The Vikings are in town. The Twins are in town. And I-94 is closed in St. Paul and I-494 is closed near the airport. If you're not coming to the games from Maple Grove, good luck with that. Ben out!