Benster and D Pick Your Games -- Turkeys Hitting the Ground Like Sacks of Wet Cement Edition

Decrepit, I'm back in the house! That means we can actually do Benster and D old school!

We're glad you're back from Knox, but western Illinois is noticeably lacking in something in your absence.

That's their fault. If they have to import the HYYYYYYYYPPPPPE!, then it's probably in short supply.

True. But they do have Steak 'n Shake.

But the real question, Geritol Fan, is do they have a scrumptious Thanksgiving Dinner like this one:

Bon appetit, y'all!

We have to keep hope alive. Meanwhile, lotsa games today. Watch me work!

Bear Down Chicago da Bearz (+7) vs. Motor City Kitties. This game looks to be an interesting one. As I've been thinking all along, the wheels are starting to come off the wagon for those irritating Lions. They get their traditional Thanksgiving Day game against da Bearz, who have been a train wreck all season long. Last time da Bearz were on national television, they got crushed in Lambeau. Now they arrive in Ford Field, where they find a desperate team at home. Jay Cutler's reaction?

Come to where the flavor is, Jay. Bears 42, Lions 41.

Fess up, Seabiscuit -- you picke717d that way just to see if Gino would send you some venison sausage, right? There's no way da Bearz score 42 today. The Lions need this game to keep pace and while they are flawed in some fundamental ways, they are better than the Bears, especially at home. While I think the Bears could hurt the Lions in Chicago in December, it won't happen today. Lions 27, Bears 14.

Philadelphia Iggles (+3) vs. Dallas How Bout Them Cowboahs. The Eagles come to town with the Sanchize at the helm. Yep, Mark Sanchez is still spelling Nick Foles, which is a problem for Chip Kelly and company. Sanchez hasn't butt fumbled yet, but he likes to do dumb things before a national audience. Meanwhile, the Cowboys have figured a few things out this season, but, as always, December looms. We're still in November, though, and the inevitable choke is a week away. Still... Eagles 27, Cowboys 18.

So you're trying to fake everyone out today, it would appear. The Cowboys are a hard team to read this season, but generally the bad karma hasn't been on them as much as in past years. As always, they have a lot of talent, but you wonder about their long-term prospects. Sanchez does not do well under pressure and the Cowboys will bring pressure. So once again, I disagree with the young fella. Cowboys 35, Eagles 31.

Seattle Seabags (+1) vs. San Francisco Harbaughs. It's the D-Bag Bowl! On this day of giving thanks, we are greeted with the spectacle of the two biggest jerk coaches in the NFL playing one another. Do you feel thankful? It is no secret that both teams have struggled this season and are still chasing Arizona. There's a pretty good chance that one of these two teams will not make the playoffs, while the other probably get the equivalent of a first round playoff bye with a trip to a woeful NFC South venue. So this game matters a lot.  One thing to look out for is Chris Borland, who has been a tackling machine since he's entered the starting lineup for the 49ers. You would figure that he has the book on his former Badger teammate Russell Wilson. I would expect a close game with a few extra curriculars. Harbaughs 23, Seabags 17.

The question at this point -- who do you like better, Wilson or Colin Kaepernick? I like Wilson. Seattle 23, San Francisco 17.

We'll be back tomorrow for our regularly scheduled football brilliance. Well, at least I'll be brilliant; I wouldn't count on much from the old dude. Ben out!