Tuesday, April 29, 2008

H & R Blockhead

So do you think that Mike Ciresi is kicking himself about his decision to bail on his Senate campaign? The Star Tribune is reporting that DFL candidate and business genius Al Franken owes $70,000 in back taxes to 17 different states.

"You're an accountant? Well then, account for yourself!"

-- Zero Mostel in "The Producers"

The accounting for Mr. Franken is not too pretty. According to the Star Tribune article:

Franken told the Associated Press that he never intended to avoid paying taxes and that on the advice of his accountant, had paid taxes to the city and state where he lived.

It's not clear if that means New York -- it could be Planet Zorf for all we know, which is apparently where Franken's accountant is based. There are probably a couple thousand competent accountants here in the Twin Cities and any one of them could have told Mr. Franken that if you do business in more than one place, there's an excellent chance that the local government in each place will be looking for a little taste. But big picture types like Mr. Franken don't like minutiae, of course.

I live in hotels, tear out the walls/I have accountants pay for it all.

--Joe Walsh, "Life's Been Good"

This incident, on top of several others, might indicate that Minnesota's Prodigal Son may still be a little, well, prodigal. Since the DFL reminds us all that we must be Happy To Pay For A Better Minnesota, our local portsiders will have a hard time selling a guy who wasn't happy to pay for a better California, New York, Wisconsin, Massachusetts, Delaware, Michigan, Kentucky, etc.

The DFL is in a bit of a quandary, though -- with Mr. Franken's campaign currently on the shoals and Ciresi out of action, they may need another candidate. There is that peacenik professor from St. Thomas. . . what's his name? Charles Nelson Reilly? No, that's not it. Jack Nelson-Pallmeyer, I think. I know that some of the more earnest lefties think he's the real deal, but my guess is that a hyphenated lefty professor channeling Dennis Kucinich isn't exactly what the DFL needs to lead its ticket this time around. Who will save their soul?

Don't worry, down-hearted DFLers, Mr. Dilettante understands your predicament and has great sympathy for your pain. I have a suggestion -- Betty ("Betty!") McCollum. Betty could step into the breach, let fly with her patented shrill accusations and brilliant legislative record and she'd be sure to beat ol' Norm. Why, she'd crush Norm! Of course it would work! And the best part is, it would open up the 4th and give Ed Matthews, the highly impressive GOP nominee, a better chance.

C'mon Betty -- Mr. DeMille says it's time for your closeup!

Cross-posted at True North


Anonymous said...

I always thought Franken was going to be a bad candidate, but not this bad. Perhaps Franken gets tax tips from the same guy who advised Wesley Snipes.
Ciresi has got to be kicking himself. I think he would have been a decent candidate in the General, but couldn't compete with Franken in th primary due to all the outside-the-state money Franken was raising. Coleman seems to be a very lucky guy.
Maybe the DFL can bring Fritz back.

Anonymous said...

Any chance that Al could step aside and let Tom Davis run?

I honestely didn't know Al was a libertarian anti government type. Wait, I guess that's not correct, he's really just a loud mouthed law breaking hyporrite. Wait, doesnt' that qualify him for congress?